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標題: Single family [打印本頁]
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-12 15:47     標題: Single family


I am from a single family, with my mum and little sister.

I work very hard to give them a better life.

I am the main family income source. In my mind, it is my responsibility to take good care of my mum and sister.

I broke up with my gf, one of the reasons is that she said I spent too much time with my family. She said she is always ranked in number 3. If something happens, i will always go to my family first.

She asked me to move out and live with her. I said no, i don't want to leave my mum and sister alone.

Even my mum told me not to worry about them, just go to do whatever i want to do.

But in my mind, i don't want them to feel like that i leave them behind to do my own stuff.

I don't want them to feel like they are my burden. Actaully they are not, they are the two most impossible people in my life.

maybe i get used to take care of them.

I make sure we go out for dinner at least once a week.Yes, it is the only dinner we eat together every week.

Yes, there is tons of pressure on my shoulder. I work two jobs, plus all these.

My mum told me to relax, it is not my responsibility to support the whole family.

If i have a relationship again or get married, eventually i need to move out.

Anyone here was or is in the similar situation, i need some suggestion from you. I feel tired and frustrated sometimes. I have too many things need to handle.

Doraemon1002
作者: katamari    時間: 2008-1-12 16:06

you've been thinking too much in my opinion, and giving yourself too much stress on this issue. You have a very understanding mom and you are a very good son, she is said the main point "eventually you'll have your own family". If you are in the age of considering marriage, I think you have to be prepared this will be happened for sure, just sooner or later.

So do you mean your gf is complaining not enough time, or she is not happy you are financially supporting your family?
作者: Catpiano    時間: 2008-1-12 16:19

I think you are doing right ... FAMILY > GF ...

Take care man, and try to relax ..  I am sure your gf will understand you .. and come back to you ..  or another good girl will show up ..  

Nice girls always appreciate guys who cares about their family ...

Before I married my wife, I asked her "You know I care my mom and brother a lots, and more then you ..  but if I am a guy, who doesn't care my mom, my brother, do you think you will stay with me?"   Of course, she said "NO"
作者: Catpiano    時間: 2008-1-12 16:21

原帖由 Catpiano 於 2008-1-12 16:19 發表
I think you are doing right ... FAMILY > GF ...

Take care man, and try to relax ..  I am sure your gf will understand you .. and come back to you ..  or another good girl will show up ..  

Nice gir ...



Your mom is your mom .. your sister is your sister ..  gf is important, and you should love her too, and the fact is, if a girl can be rated # 3 to a guy, that is good for her already!
作者: Ultraman    時間: 2008-1-12 16:26

There should be no judgment on what you're doing is right or wrong, good or bad geh. And there is no such theory that "if you're going to live with your mom and sister after married, you won't find any wife"! Maybe many gals prefer to live with their husband only without any other family members. But there are some gals wouldn't mind that (and actually I know some gals who are living with the guys family for no problem at all).
Now I understand why you need to work for 2 jobs. I won't say this is good or bad, but I only know you would be very tired lor. But after all, you have your own value, and you are a good man!
作者: Alcoholic    時間: 2008-1-12 17:14

when you gf become your wife, then she will become part of the family...
maybe she is not complaining that you aren't taking care of her good enough. i think some women just wants to be put into the 1st place status jeh.

i think you're being a real man la~
作者: Intelstan    時間: 2008-1-12 17:56

Taking care of your family and moving out can be different things.  You can always live with your gf and still financially take care of your family.
作者: blueprint    時間: 2008-1-12 18:28

Doraemon, I don't think I had a similar situation like yours, just a bit, but just want to let you know I really admire your strength.  After reading your sharing here and the other thread "working two jobs", I believe that you are an extremely hardworking guy and you have done your bests.  

I'm glad that you are working less time and trying to relax for a change.  Time to enjoy yourself alone, with your family, with friends and stuffs.  Life is short, cherish it.  

May I ask how old is your sister?  If she is old enough to have a job then maybe she support financial status a bit.  It's good to acquire work experience either ways.

Add oil!
作者: raima    時間: 2008-1-12 19:42

did it ever occur to you that, one day, your gf will become your wife. and then she IS family too? if you continue to identify gf as just gf, and your family as your family (and family 1st), then how can you include your gf to be your potential wife, and then family??
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-14 09:31

just had a big fight with my mum.

We were arguing about a lot of stuff.

There were a lot of stuff that were hiding in my mind for so long, i let my mum know yesterday.

I told her i am very tired, my mind, my body. There are tons of load on my shoulder.

I work hard, but i don't see the result.

My mum said i am a very negative person, worrying too much. I don't look forward, think too much about the stuff in the past.

We used to be very wealthy before 1997, we lost everything in a very short period after.

We have been suffering for 10 years already. all the debt, mortgage, they drained all the energy out of our body.

life is tired and not enjoyable for me at this moment. I don't see my future.
作者: satsuki    時間: 2008-1-14 11:14

doraemon,
don't be like that la~ you are not the only one suffering, many many people dou hai gum la (like having debt, mortgage etc)
don't think back to those rich days, as much as you (and I) like dora-chan, there is no time travel machine and time cannot go back
you gotta look forward!!
just relax man, it's just that too much things happening at once, or more like everything bottled up for too long and just had to explode ji ma~
有咁嘅反應都好正常啫~
得閒咪上嚟LYK吹吓水囉~冇嘢架喎
作者: Ultraman    時間: 2008-1-14 11:38

原帖由 doraemon1002 於 2008-1-14 09:31 發表
just had a big fight with my mum.

We were arguing about a lot of stuff.

There were a lot of stuff that were hiding in my mind for so long, i let my mum know yesterday.

I told her i am very tired, m ...

You are not the only one, doraemon1002! I know some friends who had very similar situation as yours, but they all stood up and recovered already and they all have new lives. Yea sometimes life is tough, but it's about your mind power, there is nothing you can't get thru! Add oil!
作者: utopia    時間: 2008-1-14 11:40     標題: Similar Scenario

doraemon,

What you are going through is exactly what my caveman been through for the last 10 years. The only different, he is the only son and no sibling.

He worked so hard like you do and get called as a "cheap a$$" by some of my friends... but as his gf, I understand him so I support him.

I guess the reason why I stayed with him (which he asked me yesterday, why do I choose to be with him, a girl like me should go for a rich guy instead of him...),
he doesn't court me as just "gf".

since day one, I know that I am as important as his mom. There is no priority list in his heart and I know very well that I am like part of his family. I guess that's make the different and he proved to me that he does really see me as his "wife" not just a gf.
作者: utopia    時間: 2008-1-14 11:45

Doraemon,

As for tiredness, that's what my caveman going through lately. I totally understand how you feel, as I share my feeling here, some LYK might comment caveman is being cold hearted that think auntie is being a burden blah blah blah.

BUT, if you Doraemon, have been through this scenario, I'm pretty sure you understand how Caveman and I feel.

One day, eventually you have to start a family. One day, you have to move out with your future wife. You cannot carry this so called "burden" forever. It hurts, and a lot of people might comment us as "cold hearted" but NOBODY have to be responsible for other lives.

Not telling you to ignore your mom and sister and move on with a new life. Instead of being negative, that's what caveman and I have been doing. We try to do it slowly, let her mom become more independent. Let  his mom slowly understand one day, we will have our own family. Yet, we will still support her financially.

Having a big fight with your mom, might not solely a bad thing because you let out everything in your heart. When Caveman let out his stressed last year, his mom cried too but it's a good trigger because his mom finally understand how stressful he is.
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-14 12:39

Utopia,

I wish i chould have posted my story here half year or even earlier.

maybe you and your husband are under the similar situation as i am, you really could point out all the things i went through with my ex.

I treated my ex as my wife too. She is as important as my mum and sister, but sometimes she just doesn't understand me.

Since the first we were together, i told her i could not promise i could give her a wealthy life, with unlimited spending, but i could promise her at least i would give her a stable life.

I told her in order to keep my promise, i need to work more and i told her i would have less time being with her. I have been trying my best, but seem like it is not the life style she wants.

Hopefully one day, i could meet the right one, that she would understand what i have done for my family, my future, and i really could take good take of her.
作者: utopia    時間: 2008-1-14 12:50

Well, we are not wife and husband yet but that's our long term goal

However, Doraemon, not all girls are like me, I'm just one weird case. By saying that, I'm not saying I am all stand out and all. I have my personal weakness that caveman always get pissed off at me (i.e. housework :p)

Perhaps, I am from the island and completely separated from materialize society for 10 good years, so I am willing to support him. Also, I am not sure about your ex but for me, I had been through more than enough love experiences which allow me to understand the best man that I want is someone that can build a bright future with me together, not alone.

Anyhow, just relax and focus on your own future. It's good that you work hard for your own and for your family, yet, you still have to work hard for yourself. You cannot always put yourself at last priority. Somehow, I figure that if you put yourself at last priority, you are not making everybody happy.

I had an argument with caveman earlier and he kinda figured out that himself. He always put me and his mom as first priority and worked so hard. At the end, we 3 are not happy.
Why? Because he is so stressed out all the time and unintentionally moody in front of us. We ain't happy because we felt as if we are a burden for him and WE DID NOT ask for it.

At least me, I did not ask him to put me on first priority that on first day, I told him I'm not one of those honger girl that i need full attention from him. I encouraged him to tell us more about his own feeling rather than eat it all up because if he ate up too much, eventually he will exploded which does not do any good but make the situation worst.
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-14 14:13


I lost 10 lbs for just a week. Breaking up is really a good way to lose weight!

Do we really need to learn from pain, in order to know how to treasure a relationship?

Sometimes i am just so confused, how do i show a girl she is very important to me?

I always think i need to guess the "answers" in her mind.

If i guess it wrong, that means i would say something wrong. I may affect the whole situation.
作者: utopia    時間: 2008-1-14 14:22

Doraemon,

Sadly, it's always like that. People need to lose their precious in order to learn how to cherish the other half.

Doraemon, it's not the right time for you to think how to learn from mistake or how to win her back at this point. The more you want something, the more you fail.
Perhaps, you can learn from LOK.

I think LOK is a good example for you. I think he learned his lesson from losing his ex and now that he knows what a girl want. I think it took him a year before he purchase this "E class" LOL
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-14 15:15

其實已經很努力了﹐放棄了許多。
很多東西也放不下。很多情況下﹐也是多做了很多別人沒有要求的東西。對她們好才主動去做﹐但最後只給人說“我沒有要求你做的﹗”

但有時沒有做﹐她們就會說要不要說出口你才懂去做呢。

我也覺得我真的是為別人而活着﹐不是為自己。

為別人而開心﹐不懂如何為自己而快樂。

快樂是一件很容易的事﹐但也是很困難。
作者: Littleprince    時間: 2008-1-14 19:01

你是一個很好的男孩子﹐做男子漢該做的事。。。

如果女友不諒解的話﹐也很遺憾﹐我相信一定有女孩欣賞你這種顧家的好男孩。。。

母親一定要照顧﹐反而妹妹呢﹐到她適當年齡便當分擔﹐正如她們也知道﹐你一個人負責是很吃力的﹐而且你也有自己的人生﹐自己的未來。。。

千萬別放棄﹐未來一定會更好~~~
作者: chihiro    時間: 2008-1-14 20:54

我跟你的情況一樣，為一不同的是，我是女仔。 為了這個家，我也辛苦過，試過同時打三份工。可我現在不同了，現在弟妹出身社會了，而我自己的事業上也有點兒成績。回望過去，我覺得自己其實很幸運，因為可以在年少時開始嘗過那麼多磨練，得益的只有多不會少。人生總有高低起跌，但狂風暴雨後會是耀眼的陽光和美麗的彩虹。
作者: blueprint    時間: 2008-1-14 21:08

Sounds like chasing after your own shadow to get rid of it (the past = the shadow), but forget that there are things ahead you for you to enjoy a truly fulfilled life.  Your family is there of course.  And then there are cool people out there for you to meet, to be friends with.  All you have to do is to step out of your own shell and try to experience it.
作者: SmellyTofu    時間: 2008-1-15 00:14

原帖由 doraemon1002 於 2008-1-14 14:13 發表

I lost 10 lbs for just a week. Breaking up is really a good way to lose weight!

Do we really need to learn from pain, in order to know how to treasure a relationship?

Sometimes i am just so confuse ...


Maybe your ex does not want to understand/cherish/need a relationship. Maybe their mind is thinking, "Plenty of other fish in the sea, why choose you and burden myself?"... Tell her your situation but let it be her choice to come back because it'd be like someone being obligated to come back.

Move forward... do something that you enjoy.... something that makes you forget the world... There's plenty of hope out there for everyone including you... ride out the bumps, smile through the hardship... if you need help, ask friends... they will be important as to how you can ride out the bumps.

Even I thought there was no hope for me, but out of the blue, a wonderful person came into my life... we share similar backgrounds from how we've come to where we're at, we share both kindness to each other and friends... for us, it's been a really positive synergy that's been created I think... hopefully this will be it.
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-15 10:08

我朋友話好仔市場好細﹐你0地有咩意見﹖

我唔甘心﹐我唔想衰俾人睇﹐從讀大學開始已經好努力。呢個時代﹐好多時看你是否成功就是看你的賺錢能力。同意嗎﹖

可能VANCOUVER食父母的有錢細路太多了﹐媽說要找一個肯跟你分擔﹐挨世界的真的不容易﹐門當戶對好像是以前的事情﹐但其實一路也存在。

可能我的ex太辛褔了﹐很難讓她明白我的苦和難處。

女孩子不是想找一個可以好好照顧妳們的男孩子嗎﹖我想每一個女孩子也不同吧。

拍拖真是很困難﹐讓人很累。
作者: utopia    時間: 2008-1-15 10:16

原帖由 doraemon1002 於 2008-1-15 10:08 發表
我朋友話好仔市場好細﹐你0地有咩意見﹖

我唔甘心﹐我唔想衰俾人睇﹐從讀大學開始已經好努力。呢個時代﹐好多時看你是否成功就是看你的賺錢能力。同意嗎﹖

可能VANCOUVER食父母的有錢細路太多了﹐媽說要找一個肯跟你分擔﹐挨世界的 ...


I don't know Doramemon, may be I dated different type of people before.
Rich is not everything. I remember so clear when I first moved to Vancouver,
I was hanging out with my friend's friend. One of them are extreme rich kid from China but act like a honger. .....

Through all the time I went shopping with him (I spend my own money, ok? just in case I get attack), he kept saying things like "How come you are so CBC looking? Even my CBC friend are more honger than you?" or... "Too bad you are so tan, if you do whitening more, I will give you 85 mark ga"

And when I told him I love to read book, then he will brag that oh he read magazine too (duh)...then I insist that's different, he said oh yeah, that make us "more educated" ar ma.............. it's like "playing piano in front of cow".......

Seriously, I rather to be with my caveman right now. We can share feeling about different book we have read or share feeling about history. Yet, we can play PS3 together and work hard toward our goal.

Perhaps, I have my own career that I aim very high, so rather caveman is rich or not. That part does not weight too heavy in our relationship. As I always tell my friend in the past, you don't pick a rich guy but you pick a man that have potential to be a rich man. By saying that, he work hard for his own fortune rather relying on parents.
作者: utopia    時間: 2008-1-15 10:19

Doraemon,

you sounds like my caveman in the past, that will not get you any good girl, u know?

sorry to be honest here but yes, we understand you work so hard for your family and for your future. Yes, we understand you work so hard in university but if you cont'd sound blaming the world for it.

It's a turn off. The real man is take up the whole burden on his shoulder without complaining the world because he knows he is responsible for these and he choose to be responsible. Nobody forced him.
作者: Traum    時間: 2008-1-15 10:29

提示: 作者被禁止或刪除 內容自動屏蔽
作者: LOK    時間: 2008-1-15 10:51

原帖由 doraemon1002 於 2008-1-15 10:08 發表
我朋友話好仔市場好細﹐你0地有咩意見﹖

我唔甘心﹐我唔想衰俾人睇﹐從讀大學開始已經好努力。呢個時代﹐好多時看你是否成功就是看你的賺錢能力。同意嗎﹖

可能VANCOUVER食父母的有錢細路太多了﹐媽說要找一個肯跟你分擔﹐挨世界的 ...

賺錢能力 is one thing ppl look at...
but since there are some ppl like our "VIP" member Mr. Hyde, he thinks he has a rich dad, so he owns everybody.

seriously, more $$$ does NOT = happier...
just make enough money to make yourself and your family don't need to worry the regular payments, that's enough. Driving a porsche or a civic could also get you to the place you need to go... Living in a 600 sq ft apt or a 6000 sq ft house could also make your family comfortable, warm, and safe.
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-15 11:50

Traum,

你講得好0岩﹐我應該知道要放手﹐再拖下去事情也只會變差。

我知道大家也只是放不下那種感覺﹐她跟我說想把我留在身邊﹐可以好好的出去玩﹐食飯睇戲﹐但是我真的做不到。我問她把我放在身邊有什麼用呢﹖

我知道總有一天我也要離開﹐只是遲早0既事。
作者: SmellyTofu    時間: 2008-1-15 12:31

原帖由 LOK 於 2008-1-15 10:51 發表
seriously, more $$$ does NOT = happier...  


Agree x9999999999999999999999999999999999
作者: scottina    時間: 2008-1-15 12:41

原帖由 doraemon1002 於 2008-1-15 11:50 發表
Traum,

你講得好0岩﹐我應該知道要放手﹐再拖下去事情也只會變差。

我知道大家也只是放不下那種感覺﹐她跟我說想把我留在身邊﹐可以好好的出去玩﹐食飯睇戲﹐但是我真的做不到。我問她把我放在身邊有什麼用呢﹖

我知道總有一天 ...

身同感受.....唉
作者: chihiro    時間: 2008-1-15 13:30

原帖由 doraemon1002 於 2008-1-15 11:50 發表
Traum,

你講得好0岩﹐我應該知道要放手﹐再拖下去事情也只會變差。

我知道大家也只是放不下那種感覺﹐她跟我說想把我留在身邊﹐可以好好的出去玩﹐食飯睇戲﹐但是我真的做不到。我問她把我放在身邊有什麼用呢﹖

我知道總有一天 ...


隨緣啦,
總有一天你會找到 the right girl
Wish you luck!
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-15 15:48


When my ex was mad, she poured water into my car, wrote bad words on my car window with her lipstick, ran out of the car when we stopped at the red light, threw my stuff away.

I was really mad at those moments. but i just didn't recgonize she just wanted to have my attention.

We laughed, we cried, we argued.

I will remember all these sweet memory.

My story is end here.

Thank you everyone.
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-17 15:00

I still miss my ex so much.

i told myself i should not call her anymore, because everytime i call her, my heart feels so much pain.

it is really a tough time for me.

I could not sleep.

My mum told me to see family doctor, she afraid i will go crazy seriously.
作者: SmellyTofu    時間: 2008-1-17 15:19

Find your friend and go out do something where you only laugh
作者: Ultraman    時間: 2008-1-17 15:20

Do you think she still loves you?
作者: myversa    時間: 2008-1-17 15:23

I think you should talk to her once more and tell her that you would change but she should change too if she still loves you.

If you decide not to patch up with her, take vacation and go out to travel for few days.  Enjoy the sun without the interferce with stuff.
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-17 15:31

not really.

She just starts dating a new guy.

I thought she has been riding two boats. The night we broke up, i asked her if she has a new bf, she said no. But as his bf for so long, when i was holding her hands, her reaction was not the same.

Last night, she called me and said, the new guy said he loves her,and she loves him too.

It was killing me. Yes, we broke up, but she doesn't have to tell me how good she is now.

She even asked me if i could tell if the new guy is truely loving her or not.

How could i help her to date the other guy??

She asked me if i could be her best friends that could go out with her,have fun. I said no!

I am not a backup. It is like, ok, she went out to try a new guy, if he is good, she will stay with him, if he is not good, she could come back to me. She thought i would be always at her back.

I just couldn't do it. I felt so upset. How could we have trust?

I know i should let her go, and should not look back.

but i really really love her, i just can't stand up so quick rightnow.
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-17 16:04

the worst thing is that she always give me a hope she will come back to me one day.

She told me she doesn't love me anymore, but she added " you never know what will happen in the future".

She said if i want her back, i need to make her love me again.

maybe i need to get wealthier, buy a big house, etc...

It is something i could not achieve in a short period of time, and by myself only.

I will take me forever even i have ok income.

my mum said some girls don't care the husband is not in the same level (income, education, etc), but some really want to marry one that matches her.

I told her i could not buy a house now, doesn't mean i could not buy one tomorrow. but she said it is too late.

Yes, i understand, if one of us doesn't love the other anymore, no matter what i will do, how i could change myself, it is still a game over.
作者: utopia    時間: 2008-1-17 16:11

Doraemon,

If she is dating a new guy and treat you as a backup. Then just forget about it and move on.

Just be cheerful, at least try. If you ever need to have a new fun life, you can always jump in us twin's thread. Hopefully, by listening our stupid jokes, it will make your day.

We ain't just hilarious on internet, we are real fun person in real life. If you seriously need to reform your life, you can always join us twin activities.
作者: SmellyTofu    時間: 2008-1-17 17:29

Doraemon... come on... get your head up high and only look forward. She's behind you... stop looking into the rear view mirror because all you will do if you keep looking the mirror is a big bump to the head as you keep moving forward. She's obviously moved on... so should you.

Life is full of up's and down's ... but it's too short.. I know it's hard to get over it.. you'll feel like crap... but from what I've been through and how I've beaten.. basically at the brink of clinical depression is to keep looking forward, laugh, keep in close contact with friends.. and ask them for their support and get you out of the house doing something... your key to a quick recover I think is your friends and family. I'm sure they'd be more than happy to drag you out and have some good ol' fashion F U N.
作者: sosocall    時間: 2008-1-18 12:35

我覺得其實你應該搵一個乖乖靜靜部住你既女朋友
但係你又想要生活中的一點"激", 搵件個性咁"烈"既女朋友
注定係辛苦自己架啦
你得兩個選擇既啫, 唔好再理責任唔責任,唔好再做雙面人, 諗清楚你要咩...
再唔係咪繼續你d責任, 搵個乖乖牌會依賴你既女朋友囉
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-18 12:44

有時真係覺得自己好賤﹐又忍唔住打俾佢﹐最後個心又俾人插多兩刀。

個個都話我個EX玩0野﹐想揾我做後備。佢出去玩過衰0左都仲有我接手。

但係有0的朋友又話俾佢出去玩0下﹐最後佢可能會知道邊個對佢最好就會回頭。

我都死心時佢又會打0黎。

好多人都叫我一刀斷算啦。

我都好明白要放手向前走。但我係局中人﹐知道要做但係都係做唔到。
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-18 12:57

個個都話我可以揾個好0的0既﹐我個EX依家當然好開心啦﹐多次同我講佢個新仔有幾好﹐以前係我好好照顧佢﹐佢依家同我講個男仔係唔識照顧佢﹐但係佢話佢照顧埋個男仔都肯。

我都唔知有咩好講0羅。

連佢阿媽都知個新男仔係玩玩0下﹐佢都要飛埋去﹐明知佢會俾人HURT我又講佢唔聽。

0甘又係﹐佢0甘大個人﹐佢都同我講佢衰佢事﹐唔駛我管佢。

佢0甘講我都好傷。
作者: weewee    時間: 2008-1-18 21:32

Don't worry la Doraemon,
you will eventually find a better gf. Someone who admire your strength, taking care of your mom and ur sis. Who appreciates you. Add oil. Hang in there. You'll be better off.
作者: Littleprince    時間: 2008-1-18 21:40

係呀﹐唔好氣餒呀﹐女孩子會喜歡顧家的男孩子的﹐因為顧家代表將來都會對新建立的家庭負責任﹐你一定能找到更好的女朋友﹐加油~~~
作者: notgoddy    時間: 2008-1-18 22:47

That is so sad. Why is the girl so selfish? It doesn't sound like she have to support anyone else.  Doraemon1002 is kind of deluded though, how can he think he is the sole support of his family?
作者: doraemon1002    時間: 2008-1-19 00:14

my friend said if i can't get better asap, i will have depression.

i talked to my ex. She said she wants me to understand her.

Let her free.

i am just not happy.

she was my support to work hard. I have never complained even i work 70hrs a week, because when i felt tired, i would think it is for our future, then i would feel i am fine.

suddenly the support is gone, and not even my fault.

If i cheated and went out with the other girl and we broke up, i won't feel this bad.

it is really really tough.
作者: notgoddy    時間: 2008-1-19 01:19

(oops what was I thinking talking in 3rd person...)

Dora, too much of a good thing can be bad. Why working long and hard when you can work smartly?

Like any rational person you would want a reason as to why she left you, and I would say it is because she was stupid and as were you.

Think it through man, you will learn from this and become a smarter person.
作者: chihiro    時間: 2008-1-20 10:23

o衣o家係過渡期，遲些你就會好o的o家啦，到時個腦清醒o左你就唔會再想打電話比你個EX，唔會再等你個EXo既電話。take your time, don't force yourself~ +oil you deserve a better girl
作者: Hiro    時間: 2008-1-22 23:53

come doraemon!~ you have been through A LOT! working and all the work in U and everything! You have gained a lot more than you know you did! Just remember one thing: you are working for a better future, for your own better future! of course hving a gf as a support is one of the ways to boost yourself to work... but i really wonder at certain times do you really think you haven't used ur gf as a backup either ma? maybe you doesnt feel you did, but ur gf might have felt that way and you didnt no... relationships are complicated. there are always two sides in a relationship. even though you think you are going on together, if the other person arent thinking the same thing, the bond breaks and ur paces will grow apart! since she chose her road, she will keep walking. as in you, you are still stepping on the same stone u did as before. Do you really want to go on like this? remember you still have a mom and sister. They CARED about you as much as your gf! THEY ARE ALSO YOUR SUPPORT TOO!!! nv think you are alone! comparing to some people on this planet, you, me, and everyone here are probably doing better than them. at the very least, you have a family, a stable income, and alive! as long as you are alive, you can walk ur way thru lows and live proudly! cuz all the things you've earned along the way is from your own efforts. and the knowledge you've gained along the way will belong to you, and you forever! DONT GIVE UP! I am sure a number of people here have gone through similar situation in Vancouver. a lot of  people here are probably affected by the 1997 crisis lightly or hardly! as long as you keep going, no way you will gonna lie on the streets and become one of the bums on the street! ADD OIL! YOU CAN DO IT!



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