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兩性失衡惡化 女向男求婚

【經濟日報專訊】本港男女失衡惡化,5個適齡結婚女就有1人仍小姑獨處,加上不少港男出現「小飛俠候群症」(Peter Pan Syndrome),逃避承擔成家立室的重擔,促使女性更主動出擊。

有女專業人員向男友提出結婚,更自掏腰包付酒席訂金;亦有女友圖策劃一場驚喜求婚記,「逆求婚」這個在日本及西方已出現的現象,開始在港浮現。

女提親 自掏腰包搞婚宴

「我們結婚囉!」30歲出頭的女專業人士,去年向同屬專業人士的男友提親,就此開始籌備婚事;物色婚宴場地期間,女方更急不及待自掏腰包落訂。

男家親友因此在背後竊竊私語,認為女方有事業,收入和家境不俗,急要提親可能因過了30歲的「重要關頭」,而且眼見男方家境富裕,故不介意採取主動。

統計處昨公布最新《香港女性及男性主要統計數字(2011年版)》,去年每千名女士,就只有949名男士,重災區更在30至49歲的年齡組別。以30至34歲為例,每千名女士,只有843名男士。若按全港有近25萬30至49歲女性從未結婚計算,即每5人就有一人是「小姑獨處」。

「女求婚被拒 分手收場」

經營求婚統籌服務的方慧欣說,早前有一名20多歲女子,與男友拍拖一段時間已計劃結婚,但男友一直沒求婚,女方遂想搞一場驚喜求婚,但最終鼓不起勇氣,「男仔求婚被拒,還可以因為女方嫌他不夠誠意,下次再來過;女方求婚被拒,便是分手收場。」

方去年至今幫過近40對情侶搞求婚,為確保成功率,事前都會訪問男方求婚把握,不少都表示信心十足,因為女友已多次催婚。

男士被催婚的情況愈見普及,心理學家提出「小飛俠症候群」的理論,泛指年輕人不想長大的心態,逃避承擔家庭責任(見另文——「小飛俠—拒長大不負責」)。

方認同現實社會中,30歲前的男士們有「小飛俠症候群」的特質,尢其是現時樓價貴,一般人萬多元收入,多不想背負家庭責任。她說一般要30至35歲才開始拼搏工作和有承擔;但女士們30歲前已考慮結婚問題,「28歲求得婚來,搞一、兩年,結婚都已30歲。」她說正因為這差異,女急男不急,女方明示或暗示催婚的情況愈趨普遍。

熟悉婚姻輔導的臨床心理學家梁若芊則認為,愈來愈多年輕人把求婚和結婚視為一場show,故男方沒求婚,女方要催婚,甚至自己求婚。她認為,兩人相處一般都有共識,明示或暗示有結婚計劃,誰向誰求婚只是一種形式。

她又指,隨着年輕人多進修,推遲踏足社會工作的時間,故結婚年齡愈來愈遲,女士所謂30歲的重要關口,其實已不再重要,且男女都不想定下來。

她說,以前的人結婚都沒有自置物業,是結婚後慢慢累積,但現代人結婚好像要樣樣都有,所謂「小飛俠候群症」,有時是自尋煩惱。
"Veni, Vidi, Vici"
竹乃清,竹乃霸道

回復 10# MoiRhapsody

因誤會而結合...

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本帖最後由 lo_pak 於 2011-7-29 11:52 編輯

回復 15# Nam

Before 30, believe in marriage is romantic...
After 30, believe in marriage is idiot...

To me, marriage is a must... Men is different from ladies in most cases, future is always in the hands of yours...

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回復 17# 老友四號

OIC...

Just curious, do you feel itchy after 7 years...?

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回復 18# Lik

You are talking about having babies, nowadays, it can have no linkage with marriage ga...

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回復 21# 老友四號

You are THE MAN>.<...!!!
"Veni, Vidi, Vici"
竹乃清,竹乃霸道

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本帖最後由 lo_pak 於 2011-7-29 12:33 編輯

回復 23# Nam

Hard to believe you see it as a burden when you are living in Canada...

Tell you the truth... You are the only barrier that block you from making the decision...

In Canada, having a baby is not the main issue; rather, how to teach is a big headache... Are you prepared ?!?...

My advice is: If you are deciding to have a babe, sooner rather be later... It's not only about your health, but also communication...
"Veni, Vidi, Vici"
竹乃清,竹乃霸道

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本帖最後由 lo_pak 於 2011-7-29 14:03 編輯

回復 27# fibbi

I like your last word... "囉"... "C9" feel, according to FY...

Somehow people have to distinguish between reasons and excuses...

As a mom @ 40 of having the first new born babe, it's way TOO... late... Don't tell me you have a plan, but rather, you are actually a dreamer... What time do you wake up? 35, 36, 37, 38, 39,...etc.

Technology is only used to help those who are physically incapable to do so... Don't abuse it! Normal ladies get about 500 in their life time ONLY before running out of bullets... Or you can freeze up your eggs until you are 100, if you stilll believe in technology 囉...

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本帖最後由 lo_pak 於 2011-7-29 14:24 編輯

回復 29# fibbi

How come it is "無問題"? Haven't you count the time you are with your kid, haven't you count the time you are with your grand kid...?

I don't actually know what HK ladies are thinking about these days... In terms of only thinking about living quality, there should be something more important...

As a lady, how many men would you think they will "like" to squeeze their "cells" to your body when you are 40?? To be honest, I would say "Go F yourself" or you can ask for donation... (Sorry of being rude...)

My friends always told me that men are 專一 because
"when we are 20's, we like 20 years old chicks";
"when we are 30's, we like 20 years old chicks"; and
"when we are 40's, we like 20 years old chicks too...
To be continue...d...

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本帖最後由 lo_pak 於 2011-7-29 15:30 編輯

回復 34# Catpiano

He may said, " I only have 1 body, how can I serve that many ladies... ... Time is money ma...

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