kaimui22

I think it really depends on what you're asking for...if you want a decent house with 2+ bedrooms and 2+ washrooms close to the city centre, it will cost you for sure. But are you willing to travel a bit and away from Vancouver/Burnaby? You can still get large houses in Surrey for a lot less than the prices in Richmond/BBY/Van.

Another thing to consider is...if you are thinking of moving to the states, have you considered how much healthcare will cost you? Here, most employers cover MSP..even if they don't, it only costs about $100 a month for a family of 3. In the states, if you have to go to the hospital or doctors for any reason, the fees are astonishing. I think the average price of having a baby in a hospital in the states of anywhere from $5000USD to $20000USD. Not to mention any administrative fees, document fees..etc

Although the cost of living might be high in Vancouver, you also have to consider if you are will to sacrifice your own standard of living to adjust to your income. If you are not willing to lower your standards or move a bit further or get an older house...then of course Vancouver is not the place for you.

kaimui22

are you sure his mom is going to stay in Vancouver PERMANENTLY? Or just temporary? Because if she is just staying temporary..might not be a bad idea to just rent a place or get a 2 or 3 bedroom townhouse. Maybe she's just here to wait for you guys to settle and get married? Once you guys are settled, she might just go back to China and let you guys have 二人世界.

I don't think it's a good idea to buy a big house (2000+ sq) right now because what if you guys move in, get married and then she gets bored of vancouver and decides to move back to China in 2 or 3 years? Is it worth putting yourself thru so much stress and such a high mortgage if she isn't gonna be here to live in the space?

Also...has your Caveman discussed the situation with his mom? Maybe she is willing to contribute a bit if you guys are getting a bigger place for her? Also try to make sure from her if she is definitely sure she will stay in vancouver for a long time..otherwise, it's no use getting such a big place for her and then have her leave.

kaimui22

原帖由 utopia 於 2008/5/16 09:12 AM 發表


ai... kaimui, we both wish his mom will stay temporary, and most likely, 99% his mom will STICK WITH US no matter what........ai......

His mom is single parent but with very very problematic perso ...

OMG..I know ppl like that! The ppl that insist your things are their and then make some 無理取鬧理由 to get their way...

hmm..single mother and only one son...so very likely she is going to stick to him
so i guess you're gonna have to look for a bigger place....

BUT...one thing you must consider before making a purchase...are you sure you and caveman are going to be OK in the future with his mom living there? I mean...right now there are already some problems, what if you guys get a place and then you can't stand her or she can't stand you? What will happen? I don't mean to be pessimistic but parents is something you must consider before getting married or planning to live together for a long time....the topic of his mom is going to come up over and over again and you can't avoid it. If you can't stand her now...can you stand living with her or have her looking after your kids in the future?

I know it sounds very coldblooded...but..if the mother-in-law and the wife cannot get along, then EVERYONE in the household will suffer...and it will also deteriorate your relationship with caveman. You gotta think about this before having a property with both yours and caveman's name!

kaimui22

utopia:

so...what will happen to the restaurant 5 years down the road when you want to move back to Vancouver? Are you just gonna shut it down? Moving down to the states, opening up a new restaurant and then moving back up to van is gonna cost you a lot of $$ and energy...are you sure you're going to be willing to give up everything again to come back to Vancouver? Also moving down there doesn't solve the issue with Caveman's mother at all. She will even probably persuade you to stay in Texas or wherever and continue to run the restaurant. Also...do you and caveman have any experience in running a restaurant at all? Where and how are you going to find all your resources? the cooks, the products, the food...etc etc. Even if caveman's uncle is willing to put his support into the restaurant, it's gonna take a lot more than just money to run a business. Also...just like what alcoholic said before, your degrees, your merits will not matter anymore if you are just going to run a restaurant. Why bother finishing up a degree if you're not going to use it?

I also have to agree with her that having 2 years or work experience and making such a big leap (buying a house?!) is going to be overwhelming for you. Changing careers is one thing...moving around to another country and buying property? That's gonna be harsh on you emotionally AND mentally.

Also.....one last thing. has caveman ever made any commitments to you? Living together is one thing...getting married will change all your ways of thinking and suddenly you'll probably want to settle and take care of your family. I don't think you should just follow him to the states or wherever and give up everything here if he is not going to give you a commitment.

kaimui22

原帖由 utopia 於 2008/5/22 10:46 AM 發表


About the restaurant, we will leave the restaurant to his uncle. If his mom choose to stay at the states, she can stay. If not, she can choose to come back to Vancouver with us.

To be selfish or f ...

So....either way, I still think opening a restaurant with such little experience is too much of a risk. Especially if you're just gonna let everything go and come back in 5 years. Opening a restaurant in the states is not going to solve any issues...it's not going to make tonnes of money for you, nor is it going to deal with Caveman's mom. It sounds more like a 拖得就拖 situation..and HOPEFULLY caveman's mom will decide to stay in the states and look after the restaurant.

So what happens if you move to the states, open a restaurant, make OKAY $$ and then come back to Van? What will happen to you and Caveman if his mom decides to give up the restaurant and move back to Vancouver with you and him? How can you be sure that the money you have earned in the states will be enough for you to buy a house in Vancouver in 5 years? Also...5 years, A LOT can happen. what if you have a baby? Then that means a 3 bedroom house will not be big enough for you, caveman, his mom and kid(s). Then you will probably need to look for a 4 or 5 bedroom house in Vancouver...and you're going to come back here with the same issues as now...the housing market, no matter how bad it goes down, it will not be below the averages you see now. In 5 years, a $800 000 house now might still cost $800 000. Just because the market is going down doesn't mean the prices will. And in 5 years, where will the inflation be?

I still think it's too much of a gamble to take right now...and also, even if Caveman can 'predict' the future market trends, I still think it is too dangerous to assume everything will be fine according to plan. There are many roadblocks in life that you cannot expect. Your plan assumes everything will be fine, everyone will be healthy and OK...but you need to think about possible roadblocks and accidents that may happen along the way.

And the thing you said about Caveman's mom being lonely and depressed...I think she needs a bit more attention right now, especially since her brother died. Maybe she's worried she'll lose Caveman to you and that is why she is holding on to him like a lifeboat.