blueprint

Doraemon, I don't think I had a similar situation like yours, just a bit, but just want to let you know I really admire your strength.  After reading your sharing here and the other thread "working two jobs", I believe that you are an extremely hardworking guy and you have done your bests.  

I'm glad that you are working less time and trying to relax for a change.  Time to enjoy yourself alone, with your family, with friends and stuffs.  Life is short, cherish it.  

May I ask how old is your sister?  If she is old enough to have a job then maybe she support financial status a bit.  It's good to acquire work experience either ways.

Add oil!

blueprint

Sounds like chasing after your own shadow to get rid of it (the past = the shadow), but forget that there are things ahead you for you to enjoy a truly fulfilled life.  Your family is there of course.  And then there are cool people out there for you to meet, to be friends with.  All you have to do is to step out of your own shell and try to experience it.